Our Viewpoint: Progress comes with compromise

Conflict is everywhere – within our families, among our friends, in places of business, on the internet – and while conflict is unavoidable and uncomfortable, it’s necessary for growth and change. But it can also halt progress where we need there to be progress, whether it’s local, national or worldwide issues. We could actually create change and get things accomplished if we were better at giving a little to get a little, but it doesn’t seem like we are willing to do that too often anymore.

Have we lost the art of compromise? Watching our politicians and interest groups – even local community leaders – fight it out in the public eye shows an interesting trend. No one, it seems, is willing to concede anything. Real progress is delayed, and sometimes impossible, when each group holds tightly to every single principle in their argument. We too often think of compromise as losing something, but when we dig in and refuse to bend on anything, that’s the real loss.

Maybe we’re not listening. Often, if we allow our opposition to be heard, we realize that they are asking for the same thing, just in a different way. What many people want is simply to be heard. The Greek philosopher Socrates lived that concept. It is said that he traveled around Athens engaging the people he disagreed with the most in long discussions in an attempt to truly understand their position and to really hear them. The term “Socratic Seminar” comes from his belief in learning through questioning. In fact, Socrates’ never-ending questions often drove his enemies to the point of exasperation.

I’m not suggesting that anyone abandon their core values and beliefs, but I do think some of the small-town issues and local matters we find ourselves embroiled in could be solved with a little give and take. We need to get back to the understanding that we can accomplish so much more when we compromise. Neither side will be completely happy, and that’s fine, because the solution is still a balance of the needs of both sides and those who benefit will benefit sooner. An unwillingness to negotiate can breed disrespect and distrust, and we don’t need any more of that. We must practice bending to one another; otherwise, we’ll snap.

— Annie Wooden